Thursday, January 29, 2009

Something to Smile About

I would like to write about God's Grace today. No matter how many times we screw up, God always provides for us. He always makes a way. It is very easy to just thank God and move on and forget what He has done for us, but I want to stress the importance of remembering His mercy and acknowledging that without Him, we would be lost.

For the past few weeks, I have been dealing with feelings of anxiety and continuous worry. When I get something in my head, it's difficult for it to leave. The enemy always uses my worst tendencies to keep me jailed in my head. But, I am so undeniably favored by God. When it seems like there is no way out, and it seems like none of your prayers are being answered... He comes to the rescue and gives us grace and forgiveness that we certainly do not deserve.

How many times can God forgive me for being so doubtful, so disobedient and so forgetful? Too many. He forgives me when I should not have any forgiveness left. He forgives me when the idea of giving me one more chance should be laughable. If my life was in the hands of man, I would be shackled and scorned. But my life does not belong to this world. It belongs to my Creator who loves and showers me with His grace.

How many times have we forgotten how good God is? How many times have we been blessed but turned around and slapped God in the face with our doubt and disobedience?

God does not keep grudges. "I will show loving-kindness to them and forgive their sins. I will remember their sins no more." Jeremiah 31:34

God always delivers. God always provides. God always forgives, God never lies. :]

Sunday, January 11, 2009

There is Hope in Your Name

When we accept Jesus as our Lord and Savior, not only are we saved from our sins and begin a new life, but we are given hope. This sense of hope inspires so many people... it is truly what makes belonging to God feel so wonderful. Without the salvation of Jesus, we would be lost; lost to the evils and temptations of this world. Lost in a cloud of doubt and hopelessness. I'm sure you know what I mean.

"She carelessly threw her cell phone to the floor and wound herself tightly in a ball. No matter how hard she tried to keep the thoughts from running away with her sanity, she couldn’t keep them from passing through the barrier. Her face was blank at first, not a sign of emotion to be seen. But when the thought she had been trying to avoid at all costs came to light, her eyes shut tightly, her mouth formed a grimace, and tears streamed sideways toward the comforter."


This is what it's like when you have no hope. All you want to do is give in to the pain because you "know" that there is nothing more that you can do. Last night was a tough night for me. I had been thinking about a lot of things that had been really bugging me in the past week, and they all seemed to team up on me and completely tear me down. Of course, at the time, I couldn't put a finger on what the issue was... until my cousin asked me what was wrong. I thought about it and knew exactly what I was dealing with: self-worth.
I was doubting myself in the worst ways possible. I literally felt as if I was worthless. But why? I started regretting things I have done, things I should have done but didn't, and started to tear my appearance to shreds. I began to think that I've really screwed up, that there is no way to fix what I've done and no way that I, me as a person, could possibly get better. But I was forgetting something... no, I was avoiding someone. I knew the answer was inside of me, waiting to get His hold on me, and I denied Him access.
In my pain, I had written a two paragraph story to get my feelings of hopelessness out. I haven't written in like that in a couple of years -- I was unsure it was what I should be doing, but I did it slowly and couldn't believe the end result. It wasn't until my cousin told me to write my feelings out that I knew God was reaching out to me. I needed to go to church, I needed God.

And today, the last song we sang before the congregation sat down was this:

In the name of the Father
In the name of the Son
In the name of the Spirit
Lord we've come

We're gathered together
To lift up Your name
To call on our Savior
To fall on Your grace

Hear the joyful sound of our offering
As your saints bow down, as your people sing
We will rise with You, lifted on Your wings
And the world will see that

Our God saves, our God saves
There is hope in Your name

Mourning turns to songs of praise
Our God saves, our God saves, yeah


While we were singing this song that I had never heard before, one line stood out to me and my lip began to quiver. "There is hope in Your name." I repeated it to myself maybe one hundred times. Everything that had plagued me the night before became pebbles compared to the boulder that God is. Just because I have many flaws in my appearance, just because I cannot say what I want to say in the way I want to say it, just because I have made big mistakes, doesn't mean that one day, Jesus won't deliver me from it all. Because He will. I am not in this predicament forever, I still have hope. Our God does save. He saves us from our sadness, anxiety, and our hopelessness.

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. -Jeremiah 29:11

Keep this near to you. There is hope and a future, even for those of us who struggle with the lies of the enemy.

Ephesians says it best:

"I pray that your hearts will be able to understand. I pray that you will know about the hope given by God's call. I pray that you will see how great the things are that He has promised to those who belong to Him."